So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
