no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
