my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
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