Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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