dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
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