Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
