hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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