So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize