with your own penis?
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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