i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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