Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
