The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
