the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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