singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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