Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
smell my finger.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Randomize
