We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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