i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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