But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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