Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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