i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
