why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
