I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
