he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
