Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
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