Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
