Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
