I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
