Your dad touched me again.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
