R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
