we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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