i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize