I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
