Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize