Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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