If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
