He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
