who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
