I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Just high enough for therapy.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
