Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
