adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Randomize
