those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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