he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Randomize
