If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize