we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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