all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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