READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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