making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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