Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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