Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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