Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
