Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
