HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
